Author Topic: Swearing at Work  (Read 1317 times)

BongGurl

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Swearing at Work
« on: October 28, 2005, 03:50:35 PM »
To all Employees:

It has been brought to Human Resources\' attention that some individuals
throughout the Office have been using foul language during the course of
normal conversation with their co-workers. Due to complaints received
from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language
will no longer be tolerated. We do, however. realize the critical
importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when
communicating with co-workers. Therefore, a list of 18 New and
Innovative "TRY SAYING" phrases have been provided so that proper
exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner.

1) TRY SAYING: I think you could use more training.
INSTEAD OF: You don\'t know what the f___ you\'re doing.

2) TRY SAYING: She\'s an aggressive go-getter.
INSTEAD OF: She\'s a f___ing bit__.

3) TRY SAYING: Perhaps I can work late.
INSTEAD OF: And when the f___ do you expect me to do this?

4) TRY SAYING: I\'m certain that isn\'t feasible.
INSTEAD OF: No f___ing way.

5) TRY SAYING: Really?
INSTEAD OF: You\'ve got to be sh___ing me!

6) TRY SAYING: Perhaps you should check with...
INSTEAD OF: Tell someone who gives a sh__.

7) TRY SAYING: I wasn\'t involved in the project.
INSTEAD OF: It\'s not my f___ing problem.

8) TRY SAYING: That\'s interesting.
INSTEAD OF: What the f___?

9) TRY SAYING: I\'m not sure this can be implemented.
INSTEAD OF: this sh__ won\'t work.

10) TRY SAYING: I\'ll try to schedule that.
INSTEAD OF: Why the f___ didn\'t you tell me sooner?

11) TRY SAYING: He\'s not familiar with the issues.
INSTEAD OF: He\'s got his head up his a__.

12) TRY SAYING: Excuse me, sir?
INSTEAD OF: Eat sh__ and die.

13) TRY SAYING: So you weren\'t happy with it?
INSTEAD OF: Kiss my a__.

14) TRY SAYING: I\'m a bit overloaded at the moment.
INSTEAD OF: F__ it, I\'m on salary.

15) TRY SAYING: I don\'t think you understand.
INSTEAD OF: Shove it up your a__.

16) TRY SAYING: I love a challenge.
INSTEAD OF: This f___ing job sucks.

17) TRY SAYING: You want me to take care of that?
INSTEAD OF: Who the f___ died and made you boss?

18) TRY SAYING: He\'s somewhat insensitive.
INSTEAD OF: He\'s a pr_ck.

Thank You,
Human Resources

Colorado

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Swearing at Work
« Reply #1 on: October 28, 2005, 04:05:04 PM »
He He
That will go on my funny board

nothing

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Swearing at Work
« Reply #2 on: October 28, 2005, 04:42:26 PM »
I think I will stick with the Swearing

BongGurl

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Swearing at Work
« Reply #3 on: October 28, 2005, 04:44:10 PM »
I do the same shit.  I\'m such a potty mouth.

nothing

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Swearing at Work
« Reply #4 on: October 28, 2005, 04:46:07 PM »
I just think it\'s more fun that way

BongGurl

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Swearing at Work
« Reply #5 on: October 28, 2005, 04:48:33 PM »
It is indeed.   :twisted:

Tinkerbell

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Swearing at Work
« Reply #6 on: October 29, 2005, 08:55:58 PM »
Hehehe Thats funny

dracutard

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Swearing at Work
« Reply #7 on: November 01, 2005, 08:42:55 AM »
Dear Human Resource Director,

It has come to my fucking attention that you are not fullfilling the fucking requirements of your fucking job.  Instead of trying to fucking micro manage the  fucking language used by the fucking staff, why don\'t you fire the fucking time wasting cry baby who fucking complained?  Better yet, tell the fucking staff who fucking complained and they will make the fucking crybaby\'s  fucking life fucking miserable at fucking work until the fucking complainer fucking quits.  Also, in the fucking future, please try to fucking hire fucking quality fucking people so that the fucking staff won\'t have to work so fucking hard while some fucking crybaby is wasting all of the fucking companys fucking time.

Fucking thank you
A fucking quality fucking employee

BongGurl

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Swearing at Work
« Reply #8 on: November 01, 2005, 08:44:14 AM »
LMMFAO!!!!  I love it!!  Slap Hands dracutard!!

Sydna

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Swearing at Work
« Reply #9 on: November 01, 2005, 08:49:10 AM »
I feel so much better now!
I work hard because millions on welfare depend on me!

http://www.myspace.com/sydna

Tinkerbell

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Swearing at Work
« Reply #10 on: November 01, 2005, 08:59:43 AM »
I wish I could cuss out my boss sometimes....welll...not really....Its my aunt whom I live with that could be bad....

gamesmstr

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Swearing at Work
« Reply #11 on: November 01, 2005, 09:32:52 AM »
Every time I feel like cussing out my boss I have to remind myself I am self employed....

BongGurl

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Swearing at Work
« Reply #12 on: November 01, 2005, 09:38:53 AM »
Then you\'d be considered insane, or you may have terets syndrome.  :wink: